No matter how happy we are with our family, it doesn’t hurt to keep improving it. These 15 tips will give you successful do’s and don’ts for a happy family.
1. Sit next to each other while making decisions
Scientists have found that people sitting next to each other are more likely to work together than people sitting opposite or diagonally apart. And that’s exactly what you need as a family.
2. Flexibility is everything
Research shows that a flexible mentality can get a lot done. Whether it’s the strategy to get everyone out the door as fast as possible first thing in the morning or the techniques you use to discipline, entertain, or inspire your family. Flexibility is key.
3. Family gatherings for a happy family
Family gatherings are usually for socializing but it is also an opportunity to draw attention to a specific behavior. How do certain topics come about and is this necessary to name? If you don’t have a safe environment to discuss issues, any plan to improve your family will likely be more difficult.
4. O Shape
Do you want more interaction with each other and better social communication as a family? Then you should sit opposite each other, preferably in a circle. Always sit at the table with the family in an O-shape, not an L or V-shape.
5. Stop Saying “You”
Instead of saying you, you, you, try WE. To gain a happy family atmosphere, an argument is more easily avoided when you say, ‘we need to communicate better’, instead of, ‘you never say what is’. You are a team so try to solve it as a team too.
6. Dim the light
When it’s time for a serious conversation, dim the light or turn on several small lights. This atmosphere makes people feel relaxed and safer. They will be better able to have a good conversation with you.
7. Connect generations
Research shows that children who know more about the successes and “failures” in their families and previous generations are more energetic and better able to cope with stress.
8. Sit back and relax
A Harvard study shows that people are more flexible and compliant when they sit on a softer surface. So a good reason not to sit around the table anymore, but to just plop down on the couch for a good conversation.
9. Invite grandma more often
According to evolutionary anthropologist Sarah Blaffer, grandparents have a positive influence on the family. An analysis of 66 studies found that mothers who receive help from grandmothers have less stress and that their children are better adjusted than children who see little of their grandparents. Also, grandparents who babysit live longer!
10. Look back
Make a game out of this. At dinner, it is good to have each member of the family relate a positive and a negative event of the day. So including yourself. Several studies have shown that watching others (including their parents) openly discuss their problems with each other also helps children to process their ups and downs and develop empathy and solidarity with those around them more easily.
There are times when your family’s needs conflict with your own. You will have to make a choice, stand your ground or adapt. Use these kinds of conflicts as an opportunity to show family loyalty.
12. Keep an overview
Create three columns and label them “To Do”, “In Progress”, and “Finished”. When family members start something, they move it from the first to the second column until it’s done. This way everything remains clear and guaranteed that you get twice as much done in this way.
13. Sport for Encouragement
Parents have an important role when it comes to a child’s experience of sports. Practice sporting activities in your spare time and focus on the positive. If your child can’t catch or shoot a ball well, don’t blame him for this, but rather say something like ‘You didn’t score, but I don’t think you give up easily!’
14. Stay tuned
Studies have shown that people in positions of power have a quick tendency to sit higher than others, put both feet on the floor or extend their fingers behind their necks. This gives them a heightened sense of superiority. It is therefore important that you sit opposite each other at the same eye level during an argument or discussion. This way you prevent one person from having to defend himself more than the other because of the submissive feeling.
15. Don’t Roll Your Eyes
Researchers have spent years studying how twitching the nose, raising the eyebrows, relaxing the lips, and rolling the eyes affected marriages. The result showed that, above all other gestures, the eye-rolling caused the most tension between partners.